The "Genius and Miraculous" District Attorneys’ Office

Oh man.  

Kimbra.  

Just when I think she can’t be a more shamelessly self-aggrandizing politician, she pulls something new out of her little white Boss Ogg hat.

Today, she released a pre-recorded message to her Assistant District Attorneys that was chock full of pure political awesomeness as she laid out her plans for solving the backlog of criminal cases in Harris County, Texas.  At one point, she literally applauds the work of her office as “nothing short of genius and miracles.”

Seriously.

If you would like to watch it in its entirety, here it is.

NOTE:  If you are reading this on an iPhone, the video may not play, but you can get to it by clicking here.

If you don’t have thirty minutes to enjoy Kim Ogg celebrating herself, here are some of the highlights:

Highlight # 1 —  Even a Pre-Recorded Kim Ogg keeps the Commoners Waiting

Even though everyone is back in the building after receiving their vaccinations, Kimbra decided that she would best reach the members of the Office with a video message rather than a general assembly.  That makes sense.  After all, the rank and file is busy trying to work on that case backlog and who has time for an afternoon meeting, when a pre-recorded video can more efficiently get the message out, right?

But this mandatory pre-recorded meeting goes on for over TEN FREAKING MINUTES before Kim takes the stage with her campaign motivational, rally-the-troops speech.  It’s a freaking PRE-RECORDED MESSAGE.  Seriously?  Y’all don’t know how to, like, trim out the first ten minutes with iMovie or something?

It’s moments like these that I’m so glad that I’m not at the office anymore.  If your name ain’t Mick Jagger, I’m not waiting on your ass to take the stage.

Highlight # 2 — Move over Chris Pratt, the Guardians of Justice are Here

Approximately two minutes after Madonna has taken the stage Ogg begins speaking, she immediately begins addressing the difficulties facing her Office.  And, of course, that starts with blasting the Defense Bar.

At the 12 minute, 12 second mark (she started talking at the 10:14 mark), she begins with throwing insults at the Defense Bar:

. . . unlike the DEFENSE BAR, whose only duty is to THEIR CLIENTS . . . GUILTY OR NOT! . . . prosecutors are tasked under the law with protecting everyone’s rights, in our search for the truth in every single case.

And then she finishes with . . . .wait for it . . . 

. . . And that’s why I call us the Guardians of Justice!

Photo created by Luke Newman

 Gag.

Highlight # 3 — Blame the Judges and their Low Bonds

So, apparently, the real masterminds behind the “Crime Wave” affecting Harris County are those damn judges who are letting everyone out of jail.  At the 13:30 mark, almost a full minute after blasting the Defense Bar, Star Lord Kimbra goes after the Judiciary.

While we know that 55 hundred violent offenders are in jail awaiting trial [TRANSLATION:  “waiting on discovery”], tens of thousands more are out on bail.  At least four thousand of them are repeat and violent high-risk offenders on ankle monitors.  Let’s get them to trial!

Seriously, go back and watch how Kim sounds like a high school cheerleader when she exclaims that “Let’s get them to trial!” part.  It’s plain silliness.  Like she just came up with that idea and is suddenly yelling “Go team! Go!”

But wait, there’s more.

She takes a potshot at Pre-Trial as she continues to levy the blame for the carnage and maiming (yes, maiming) affecting Houston on these damn low bonds.

We’ve seen defendants commit crimes even while wearing ankle monitors and we know that we’re rarely notified. It’s these repeat and violent offenders, freed on insufficient bail, who are contributing to the crime wave that’s killing, injuring, maiming Houstonians.

Highlight # 4 — the Emergency Case Backlog Reduction Program

Once done blaming everyone but herself (and also, strangely, Covid) for the backlog, Kim gets down to business by rolling out her new idea called the Emergency Case Backlog Reduction Program. 

This new and innovative program authorizes overtime and extra pay for prosecutors to examine cases and determine whether or not they are serious or violent offenses.  If they are not, offer Diversion Programs that help move less serious cases.  

What a fantastic idea.  Wish I had thought of it.  Better yet, I wish she had implemented it at, you know, like at the START of the pandemic.

Although I’m all for prosecutors reviewing bullshit less serious cases, her “program” seems to be like a bit of overkill to me.  Overtime to evaluate cases?  Here’s a novel idea — how about asking prosecutors to hear out defense attorneys in court when they point out that a case is either weak or not serious, instead?  It’s really not all that complicated.  

As my mentor, the late, great Ed Ziegler once said:  “We’re pole vaulting over mouse turds, here.”

Instead of yet another Ogg Program, how about just returning some discretion to the trial bureau so that your rank and file prosecutors aren’t scared of getting fired if they dismiss a case or offer a pre-trial diversion?  Just a thought.  

My favorite part of her diversionary program is the warning she gives at the end:

The defense needs to respond.  After all, it’s in their clients’ best interest.

Um, yeah.  The first time I let a grandstanding-ass-politician like Kim Ogg tell me what’s in my client’s best interest is the day I need to hang up my law license. 

Diversion programs are very nice resolutions to the cases the State can actually prove, but if Kim thinks attorneys are going to be flocking to those programs without evaluating the cases against their clients first, she’s really banking on a large batch of ineffective defense attorneys.  Diversion Programs are not a substitute to fighting a bad case, just fyi.  In addition to having the tool of a diversion program, Kim needs to make sure that her prosecutors know that they can dump a piece of crap case without repercussions, as well.

Highlight # 5 — Experience Matters, if there is any of it left

Kim then moves on to those serious and violent cases that won’t be eligible for a diversion program, and she calls upon “our most experienced chief prosecutors, now serving in vertical and specialized prosecution units” to help the newer prosecutors try serious cases.

Take charge, Senior Prosecutors.  Help us make this program work!

There is no doubt that experience matters and Kim is right to call upon the senior prosecutors to help combat violent crime.  There’s just one small problem with that…

She’s fired or otherwise run off the vast majority of them. 

Whether it be the thirty-odd prosecutors she fired before even taking office, or the ten or so chief prosecutors that she ran off during her absolutely idiotic Pandemic Witch Hunt last year, experience is in extremely short supply at the D.A.’s Office these days.  The definition of a “senior prosecutor” has never been looser in the history of the Office.

She’s 100% correct in saying that senior prosecutors are needed during this time of crisis.  Unfortunately for all involved, there just aren’t very many left.

She closes this ridiculous speech by giving a motivational rallying cry:

Team, we have a big job ahead of us, but the STATE is ready!

Those of us who practice in the CJC know that under Kim Ogg’s leadership, nothing could be further from the truth. 

from Texas Bar Today https://ift.tt/3jwOaOs
via Abogado Aly Website